Episode 161

full
Published on:

3rd Oct 2023

Step into the Mood You Want to Live In

"Anyone can become angry-that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the

right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way-this is not

easy."  –Aristotle

As human beings, we sometimes fail to make desired changes despite good ideas and great intentions. Daniel Goleman coined the necessary emotional intelligence to make desired or unforeseen changes.

However, knowing that you lack some emotional intelligence is not enough for you to be more emotionally intelligent.

Missing is how do we go about learning the necessary emotional intelligence?

As is often the case, understanding what we do over and over and why may not lead to successful changes.

With all our knowledge and skills, smart, successful people get stuck, are blind to options and create messes for themselves or others.

Here’s what we want you to get from listening to this episode: 

Gain emotional insight that you never had before: 

The ability to recognize the emotions that keep you where you are and the skill to leave them for a more useful one. With practice we can in fact learn new emotions and leave others behind for a time

Is there an emotion you’d like to leave behind or one you’d like to visit more often?

Time Stamps:

Moods and their impact on daily life. 0:02

Chad and Shelley discuss their moods and practices, sharing tangible ways to improve one's life.

Chad argues that moods are overlooked and impact daily life, encouraging self-awareness to recognize and manage them.

Emotions, moods, and self-awareness. 4:30

Shelley Prevost: Emotions are chemical experiences that are fleeting but involuntary, and can be influenced and practiced through self-awareness and self-mastery.

Chad Prevost: Being emotional is natural, but being overly emotional can be criticized, and emotional life can be influenced and practiced through self-awareness and self-mastery.

Chad and Shelley discuss the role of emotions in their podcast recording, with Chad expressing frustration at external distractions and Shelley highlighting the importance of awareness and commanding emotions.

Aristotle's ideas on emotions are mentioned, with Chad wondering if humans have evolved since his time.

Emotional awareness and managing negative emotions. 10:06

Chad and Shelley discuss the difference between unconscious and conscious emotions, with Chad highlighting the importance of awareness in managing emotions.

Chad identifies as an Enneagram type four, often thinking about what is missing or lacking in his life.

Emotional idealization and its impact on mental well-being. 15:22

Chad discusses idealization and its impact on his emotions.

He acknowledges that this idealization can lead to disappointment and melancholy, and suggests practicing awareness of emotions as a way to address this issue.

Emotional states and moods. 20:53

Shelley and Chad discuss the concept of "acceptance" as an antidote to negative emotions like resentment, anger, and resignation.

Shelley identifies pride as a common example of an emotional negative disposition that can be overcome through acceptance, recognizing what she needs to accept about the situation and trusting that her work is not to control everything.

Chad and Shelley discuss the importance of recognizing and working on one's emotions, particularly the moods that trigger suffering and chaos.

Show Notes:

A General Theory of Love by Lewis, Amini, and Lannon

Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman

Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

Field Guide to Emotions by Dan Newby, Curtis Watkins

Find out more about Big Self School

We still offer our flagship burnout coaching package. We also offer packages for those seeking clarity and reconnecting to their life purpose. Reach out to us if you’d like to book a discovery call and learn more about our coaching packages.

Want to learn more about the role stress plays in your life, and discover your blueprint for how to handle it based on your Enneagram type and subtype? 

Book a discovery call here

Join us at the Burnout to Big Self Facebook Group

Order a copy of Chad’s book Shock Point or order an ebook here.

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Find us at bigselfschool.com

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About the Podcast

Emma Will See You Now
Wellbeing available for everyone
Your place to turn to for all things wellbeing.
Sometimes lively, sometimes provocative, always here for your purpose-filled life.
Redefining mental health. Redefining wellness.
We are on a mission to make emotional and mental wellbeing available to everyone.
Subscribe now and embark on a path of self-discovery, creativity, and expanded living.
Life above the line.

About your host

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Chad Prevost

Dr. Chad has advanced degrees in creative writing, literature, and theology. Being married to a psychotherapist has been another education. A workshop leader and entrepreneur, he has started and participated in writing and literary arts communities in New York, Austin, Atlanta and Chattanooga. He also has experience writing as a journalist for startups in tech and logistics. He is the author of several books of poetry, as well as interactive-fiction for youth. Over the years, he has innovated writing processes to foster reflection and insight, narrative strength, and authentic voice.